5.04.2004

it's nearing mother's day,

so i thought i'd post something motherly-related. you know, i think as we grow older, our parents become nicer and nicer to us. or at least, we perceive that they become nicer parents. age is directly proportional to the degree of nice-ness we perceive our parents to be?

when we're small and our parents (esp. moms) have to nag and/or yell at us to do small things like take baths and go to bed and take medicine, we think they're horrible people don't we? and then we grow to be teenagers and in between the fights/conflicts we still know somewhere deep down that they love us. NOW i think.. well a parent's love is really unconditional. now that i live by myself and have to take care of EVERYTHING within a household, i realize how great women are. how amazingly patient and self-sacrificial and hard-working my mom is.

even though "in this day and age" housework is divided somewhat equally between the mother and father, ultimately there is this invisible responsibility on the woman's shoulders that if something in the household goes wrong, she should be the one to blame. if the dishes pile up too high in the sink, our first reaction would be, where is the mother? or if the baby's crying for his diaper to be changed, our minds would flash the IDEAL picture of a mother hurrying to the baby's aid. which is probably WHY some men consider their wives to be very naggy. kinda like marge simpson. nagging at them to take out the trash, to catch cookie crumbs with a plate, to vaccum, to mow the lawn, blah blah blah. because if they didn't nag, the average man probably wouldn't take care of it. why? because "it's not at the top of my priority list." and what THAT translates to is "i don't care" or "it's none of my business" or, most commonly found in esp. traditional households, "THE WOMAN WILL DO IT."

if you're reading this and you disagree, there are two possibilities: 1) you're lucky enough that you grew up or currently live in an above-average household, or 2) you're a guy. and if you agree, you probably hold either the attitude that 1) yes! we should definitely do something to change it! (in which case, is futile) or 2) life is unfair, deal with it. i semi belong to the latter now, which is why i'm rambling about this to mr. blog and also saying,

mom, thank you for doing everything you did so that i turned out acceptably normal.

now i just have to translate this into chinese and write it in a card........

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